My Chiron Return Pilgrimage

It is in and thru imperfection that we work out perfection in complete and utter acceptance, letting go to release wanting, wishing, desiring, expectations. Surrendering desire, dissolving thoughts thinking we want and need things, people, experiences, etc., to come to acceptance, which is unconditioned loving of life as is in all its beauty without filters.

Mine had to do with how I am loved, a certain way of wanting to be loved. Hardness came when my insistence of wanting things a certain way instead of surrendering, flowing, being with what is reality and truth as is. Denial is hard because we can never have what we want and desire from mind fabrications that is not real and in front of us living, breathing, flowing, as is, showing us truth blatantly.

Life has a funny way of teaching this lesson of complete utter acceptance or love of what is real, presence, the now. It puts things and people in our path to show us our incongruence, to help us see how our wanting doesn’t work and how it causes harm to ourselves and others.

Grace helps us to see that it can never work. Mercy transforms us to be with truth as is, to accept and love it all, to change our hearts and minds for acceptance of what is, so we may harmonize with life, with what is.

To deny wisdom is death. Wisdom is the conscience that speaks to our souls, hearts, minds, to help us flow with life, to master lessons of our soul. It opens doors to the fulfillment of our vision connected to soulful awareness. It helps us fulfill our truest life purpose.

I have a vision of going on a pilgrimage when I turn 50 this year, to see how life will honor and show up for me. I am contemplating and being with the theme of equality and how it is expressed in each of us, how we allow this voice to speak in and thru us, how we choose to live this ageless wisdom, soul to soul.

I am inspired by Satish Kumar’s pilgrimage, and I have chosen to follow his example, to listen to the voices ancient, to go on this pilgrimage without money, to trust life to provide from its infinite boundless amazing stores.

As this vision quest is coalescing into reality, for me to live and embody the eternal theme of equality, I am being with all my demons, my wanting, desiring for things of the mind, fabrications that can never be because it isn’t truth or reality.

Only I can face these monsters because I created them. When I choose to face them they can be known and dissolved, I can be clear to flow and align with life as is. I can be freed from the nets and snags I created, when I realize I create my thoughts and conditioning, that I can change or dismantle them.

I can choose to simply be with reality and flow, or I can remain stagnant bound by my own creations, interpretations, meaning I give to things, my perceptions of how things are for me. I realize I can trust nothing that is projected. I can only trust that still awareness that is unbiased, speaking in all of us.

This still true voice, wisdom, conscience, consciousness, intelligence, guides to lead us to safety, to give us rest, to help us know peace, harmony, balance, equality. It is impartial, neutral.

I am learning neutrality, to withhold judgment of the mind, to suspend interpretation of making something mean anything, to simply be with, see, experience, know, sense things in their truth and reality. I am learning not to supplant authentic truth, reality of life as is flowing, coursing, streaming.

It is about being with, standing with, sitting with what simply is without needing to change any of it, to fully completely accept it in its fullest truth. In full acceptance is unconditioned love, open warm reception of what is. I realize it is a choice I make moment to moment. It is a choice we all make together. It entails freeness in this choosing that is granted to each of us by life that sustains all things. It is completely unconditional in accepting whatever choice we make, even when it is against ourselves, against life, for death.

So, it is up to us, all of us, to do this together. It is our choice, in how we work together or not. This is our way to equality individually and collectively. It is truly our responsibility and our choice because life is all for us to choose what happens to ourselves, to each other, to the world. We have a choice, many choices to make alone and together. This is the theme of my pilgrimage, to choose equality, to embrace life as is, to remain neutral within myself, to support whatever is, to consciously choose reality.

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